Holidays Can Be Celebrated Even During Illness
NJHealth Hospice and Palliative Care team members Julia Hertz, RN case manager, and Elizabeth Parkinson LPN help patient Janet Lesperance prepare for the season.
The holidays often bring warmth, tradition, and togetherness, but when a loved one is facing a terminal diagnosis, the season can also bring intense emotion, uncertainty, and sadness. The joyful anticipation of the season may now feel solemn and bittersweet. Yet, according to NJ Health Hospice and Palliative Care, observing the holidays, gently and intentionally, can foster comfort, connection, and cherished memories.
Discover New Ways to Honor Tradition: You don’t have to abandon family customs. Instead, find ways to simplify or adapt them. Light a candle for each family member who has passed away, prepare a time-honored dish that brings back fond memories, or decorate your loved one’s room with familiar holiday items. These small gestures provide a feeling of normalcy while acknowledging the changes that this year may bring.
Create Space for Rest and Reflection: “The holidays may cause additional anxiety for caregivers,” explained Melissa Douglas, RN, patient care manager at NJ Health Hospice and Palliative Care. With over 30 years of nursing and hospice care experience, she suggests that caregivers slow down and even decline invitations to events or gatherings that feel cumbersome. “You don’t have to do anything that causes additional stress for you or your loved one,” she said.
Instead, she advises caregivers to schedule quiet time for themselves, read, take a walk, or sit with a cup of coffee. A moment to breathe and to take control of your well-being counts as much as the care you deliver to your loved one.
Simple Moments Make a Difference: Even if their energy is limited, moments of connection with your loved-one can be meaningful. Share favorite holiday music, reminisce over old photos, or enjoy family traditions like baking together. These small experiences can bring joy to you both and will be a treasured memory. As your loved-one is declining in their condition, do what you can together to bring joy.
Seek Support: Lean on your family and friends, and consider hospice care. While some may want to wait until after the holidays, enlisting hospice care now is a benefit to both patient and family. Hospice care provides oversight, nurses, certified home health aides, social workers, chaplains and volunteers who help share care responsibilities, listen, and provide clinical, spiritual and emotional support. Hospice Care is covered by Medicare and Medicaid, sometimes with small copays, and most private insurance plans.
Remember, you are not alone. Ask for support from others when your days get tough.
Be Grateful: Though you may feel fragile at this time, gratitude can be grounding. “Reflect on the love you’ve shared, the laughter you’ve experienced, and the memories that continue to connect you,” says Douglas. “Gratitude doesn’t obliterate grief, but it makes space for both love and loss to coexist.”
For those families with a loved one with a terminal illness, the holidays may look different this year. Yet, they can still be meaningful and provide connection and joy.
At NJ Health Hospice and Palliative Care the mission is to surround ourselves with like-minded team members who share a common bond of passion, a gift of empathy, and a devotion for helping others. The team possesses industry leading experience yet maintains a small company feel that is dedicated to personal connections. We serve our community, patients, and families with a total commitment of genuine concern, respect, and compassion which they deserve. We are there when you need us most. Visit us at www.njhealthteam.com, or call 856-696-5340 for more information.
