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‘Limerickal’ Approach to Going Green

Just for fun, our columnist tries writing a limerick for St. Patty’s Day using AI Chat Box.

by by J. Morton Galetto, CU Maurice River, and AI Chat Box

It was a few years ago when I did a story for St. Patrick’s Day and in honor of the Emerald Isle. It was about going greener and included hints and encouragement for becoming more environmentally aware. I thought it would be neat to write the suggestions as limericks. However, there is just one problem: I can’t write poems or limericks because I’ve no sense of rhythm.

So I got another bright idea: What if I put my story into an artificial intelligence program and commanded it translate the suggestions into limerick form. But as it turns out the AI program I employed, Chat Box, couldn’t do all my suggestions at once. The number of words had to be limited and it was necessary to break down my ideas into smaller bits. Unfortunately it took a brief suggestion and e-x-p-a-n-d-e-d it into a limerick way beyond the desired content. Maybe that is what the Irish do as well?

AI is so much in the news these days that I thought the readers might find it interesting to see what it did with my writings. The result will take some decoding on the part of the reader, but once you get into it, you may find it entertaining—or maybe just weird. To get the hang of my challenges let’s start with an example.

Here is AI’s limerickal approach to my introduction to ways of going greener. “Limerickal?” you ask. Yes, I use real intelligence to make up words!

On St. Patrick’s Day, we all feel Irish,
But not all of us are very cherishing of the color green,
For its environmental scheme,
We should celebrate in ways less garish.

Worrisome at best because AI seems to be suggesting that we shouldn’t go green. At the very least it is ambiguous, so it’s not so very INTELLIGENT. And “cherish” and “garish” don’t really work as rhymes for me, and the meter in the lines doesn’t match, but who am I to judge? Still, I’ll spare you further editorial comment; just know I am not feeling threatened by the poetic skills of AI.

Here was my first suggestion for going greener: Consider an electric car the next time you purchase. Infrastructure has some catching-up to do and you might have to install a special hook-up at home, but you will be helping ease global warming and at the same time saving at the pump.

What Artificial Intelligence came up with:

An electric car, consider to buy,
To make Mother Earth less prone to fry,
There’s some catching-up
We need infrastructure, yup,
And a special hook-up to get by.

The benefits are worth the cost,
Electric’s a bargain, a steal at most,
Ease global warming’s strain,
Save gas, be smart and sane,
It’s a win-win, a green-engined boast!

Energy-saving products have appeal,
Costs going down, it’s quite a steal,
For long term savings surely,
But short term too, truly,
With good lighting, bills lose their zeal.

Whoa! Artificial Intelligence couldn’t take a lot of words and write my entire story, but it could take a few words and really go overboard! Immediately I thought of my editor having to devote the entire issue to my article. The “Deep Do Do” neon sign in my office started flashing. From this point on I have chosen to share much less of what I was provided by AI!

Me: Energy-saving products are getting cheaper all the time, not only for the long term but short term too, especially lighting products. At the CU Maurice River office we put in four-foot flat LED overhead lights and it keeps our electric costs down.

Artificial Intelligence:

Energy-saving products have appeal,
Costs going down, it’s quite a steal,
For long term savings surely,
But short term too, truly,
With good lighting, bills lose their zeal.

Take the CU Maurice River’s choice,
LED overhead lights to rejoice,
Electricity bills go down,
Costs will no longer make you frown,
Savings you can hear in your voice.

Me: The suggestion was about the wisdom of carrying our own bags for shopping.

Artificial Intelligence:

In Jersey, shopping will soon change,
Your own bags will be in your range,
From May fourth, you’ll see,
No more plastic for free,
Reusable bags become less strange.

To ease the transition for you,
Some helpful tips you can accrue,
Before you hit the store,
Have bags that won’t bore,
In your car, ready for review.

So be prepared to carry your load,
Reusable bags will help with the code,
A greener New Jersey,
For a better monopoly,
Keep reusable bags at your abode!

Me: The suggestion dealt with shoddily-made clothing wearing out quickly and polluting our environment.

Artificial Intelligence:

Some clothes made so poorly, they’re trash,

Intended to wear just in a flash,
But tons end up abroad,
In the ocean they’re flawed,
For sea life, it’s a destructive bash.

West Africa, Ghana, all around,
Our clothes are polluting, it’s profound,
A mountain of trash,
On beachfronts, a slash,
From wardrobes primarily plastic-bound.

Let’s think of clothes that will last,
Replace the old with a durable cast,
Minor efforts we make,
Fashionable, just take,
For a greener world, let’s hold fast.

Me: This suggestion addressed how less meat in our diet is beneficial to the planet.

Artificial Intelligence:

If less red meat you decide to eat,
Your carbon footprint will see a defeat,
Don’t think that you’re free,
From the cows’ “burpy” spree,
For methane emissions they’re hard to beat.

More than factories, cars, planes they top,
Their burps in the air, they won’t stop,
A greenhouse gas reign,
From cows in the plain,
It’s time we reduce meat, let’s swap.

Beef needs more water than we know,
A third of the world’s usage they blow,
And land, half the States,
Used for cows, which creates,
Big impact where food and trees might grow.

Trees fight global warming, it’s true,
While cows help build the earth’s carbon queue,
So let’s limit our beef,
And with no disbelief,
We can make a big impact with what we chew.

So possibly you’re asking what would happen if you put in the same passage again? Would you get the same results? The answer is “No;” here is the newly crafted limerick:

On Earth, there’s a cow invasion,
1.7 billion, the population sensation,
Their biomass is high,
All creatures pass by,
Nature replaced, it’s an unwelcome equation.

Before serving burgers, think twice,
We’re consuming more than what’s nice,
Beef’s a delicacy,
But for our health and earth’s history,
Limiting intake is our helpful advice.

Nutritionists suggest, it’s true,
We should eat beef less often, not a new view,
For a healthier diet,
We can try it, let’s not fight it,
It’s a small step to a greener breakthrough.

Me: The suggestion was to compost your vegetable scraps.

Your veggie scraps, don’t throw just yet,
Composting them, we can’t forget,
A pile we start,
It’ll do its part,
Quickly turning scraps to soil, yes, you bet!

Two-thirds of trash it will cut,
Our former negligence, now a shut,
For the garden’s gain,
Compost’s not in vain,
Volume to landfill, it’s not a must.

If compost you can’t easily do,
Perhaps a neighbor can help you,
For a greener scene,
The scraps in with the green,
And our earth will thank us too.

There were more suggestions, but honestly my brother-in-law is much better with limericks than AI. Hopefully you found this exploration of Artificial Intelligence interesting. These likely could have been improved by editing but I doubt that AI will be in the running for the next Pulitzer Prize. Anyway, may the luck of the Irish be with you as you embark on making a positive difference for our planet. Go Green!

Nature Around Us